I'm finding this dating game more and more difficult. After the disastrous encounter with A I'd decided to turn celibate for a while.
However, I met a lady at a bar (she was a friend of a friend) and we hit it off straight away. Things were going great. We had a first date, quickly followed by a second. On the second date there was the first kiss - it was nice.
On the third date I picked her up from her house. This is where it all went downhill. I asked to use her bathroom. At this point I didn't know I was anal. In fact I thought I was anything but anal, however, when I saw her toilet I could have heaved. I realise now that I am anal when it comes to toilets! My toilet is regularly scrubbed clean - the rest of the house may be a mess but my toilet is spotless! Her toilet, however, was caked in brown limescale. Even though I only wanted a pee I couldn't force it out - my stomach was churning.
So, I just flushed, washed my hands and walked away. I then descended the stairs where she was waiting for me. She reached out for a kiss and - I couldn't! I avoided the moment as all I could see was the filthy toilet - I found myself disgusted at her toilet and her!
Now, we have had date four and I cannot bring myself to kiss her. She asked me, "Do you even like me?" and I answered, "Yes."
I wanted to say, "Yes, but please clean your toilet!"
You can tell a lot from a person by their toilet. I think you made the right decision! Or you could turn up for date five with a bottle of bleach instead of wine!
ReplyDeleteCould have been worse - you know - like you may have been invited round for a meal - and JUST as you were about to sit down - you could have asked to use the loo - or even worse - you could have just eaten first course and then used the loo!!!!!!! YUCK! As the advert says "Time for a sharp exit!!!!!" YUCK YUCK YUCK! I so agree with the previous comment - love it, "You can tell a lot about a person by their toilet!" Hilariously true. Can just hear my mum saying those words - and her toilet was SPOTLESS! lol! Great! Sorry it didn't work out - there will be clean toilet owners out there for you hun xxxxx
ReplyDeleteThat made me laugh out loud. I once stopped dating a man because he drank chocolate milk and sighed, 'Aaaaah!' after each sip - mouth wide open and gooey spittle stretched from the top of his mouth to the bottom. I couldn't look at him again. Once someone does something to turn you off - it's off. She obviously doesn't even think there's a problem with her toilet - so what else is she neglecting....? Move on.
ReplyDeleteewww no way!! that is SO gross. I don't actually blame you there ;) but yay for getting out there and dating!
ReplyDeleteI have a lovely friend whose toilet is not 'dirty' but always limescaled but this is because she believes limescale is better than pouring moutains of bleach into the water courses and cares about the fish. I totally respect her for it, I however, live in fear of being judged by my toilet bowl and scrub it to within an inch of it's life!
ReplyDeleteI have another friend who commented once at my dash to the loo cleaner when someone was on their way round: "real friends don't come to look at how clean your toilet is" which I think is very true but if you plan on sharing bodily fluids with someone you kinda want to know they have your standard of cleanliness!
Lucky escape, I'm not the cleanest person on the planet but if I'm expecting company I clean the loo...
ReplyDeleteThis made me chuckle. I admire your honesty. I also don't like dirty loos and I keep ours clean. And I've had to unblock them on various occasions too. They're new loos but the pipes must be narrow - or my kids are chucking exam papers down there as well. Also, do you remember the toilet scene in Trainspotters?
ReplyDeleteI'm the same with the toilet. Its not anal, its just....being clean! The other day I had to use a toilet on a train for the first time in my life, god it was terrible. Lovely post about budding relationships. I can't imagine how hard it is to try to find the right person (as we get older), but I'm very sure that you will.
ReplyDeleteIn reply to your question about the guest post - yes, I would be honored.
Hahaha! I'm sorry but this made me giggle! Isn't it funny how some things just make us so disgusted and affect the person we're trying to date too?!? Oh Spencer, I'm sorry!
ReplyDeleteHA HA..doesn't it seem like there is always something?? I have to agree with this one though! I am not a neat freak..but my toilet is always clean... and goodness...I would NEVE have a man over without scrubbing it..just sayin!!!:)
ReplyDeleteLOL this is great. I am not defending the dirty loo - cos erm well yea yuck factor. Yet the fact you had soap to wash your hands is a bonus. I have been in many places they have no soap! dirty loo says one thing. dirty hands say another - I have a small bit of OCD lol
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness, I laughed all the way through your post and the comments! I say, bring the bleach over and make your next date a cleaning! HAHA!
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