I was speaking to a friend at work today who mentioned that he had to take his son for his pre-school booster. This reminded me of the time I had to take my daughter for hers.
After having two injections (one in each leg) my little girl hobbled out of the surgery with tears flowing down her cheeks. Trying to make her feel better I suggested,
"Shall we go and get some sweets?"
To which she replied,
"My daddy said that I mustn't accept sweets from strangers!"
Heart crumbing I stated,
"But....I'm...your...daddy!"
"No, your not" she said, "my daddy wouldn't let horrible things happen to me and he certainly wouldn't standby whilst a horrible person stabbed me in both legs!"
Wracking my brain for something to say, whilst trying to hold back the tears, it suddenly came to me,
"How about chocolate ice-cream?"
Just then her glare turned away from the ground and she looked up at me with those beautiful blue eyes. She put her tiny little hand into mine and said,
"I love you, daddy!"
Chocolate ice-cream - you've just got to love it.
(And best of all the same trick seems to work on the other lovely lady in my life!!).
Wednesday, 30 June 2010
Tuesday, 29 June 2010
Punkah Wallah Wanted!!
Whilst lying next to my lovely lady on Sunday morning she commented that we could do with a fan to circulate the air during this hot and humid spell we are currently experiencing. I thought that this was a splendid idea! So, today I took a trip down to my local B&Q with the intention of procuring such a product.
On the way there I passed a combine harvester working the fields (it may have been sowing or gathering, I'm not sure) and thought to myself,
"I wonder how many people the development of that machine has put out of work?"
Then, as I passed by the self service tills the same thought passed my mind,
"I wonder how many people the development of those machines has put out of work?"
And, at that point, I decided that I would take a stand against the march of technology that has done so much to harm the employment prospects of my fellow man. Therefore, I didn't purchase the fan and instead placed the following advertisement in the local newsagent:
Punkah Wallah Wanted!!
- Seasonal work opportunity.
- Wallah must be able to provide own Punkah.
- As this is for a 3 storey townhouse the Punkah must have an especially long rope or the Wallah must have unusually long arms.
- Excellent rates of pay for the right candidate.
- Apply within.
I already feel better about myself.
On the way there I passed a combine harvester working the fields (it may have been sowing or gathering, I'm not sure) and thought to myself,
"I wonder how many people the development of that machine has put out of work?"
Then, as I passed by the self service tills the same thought passed my mind,
"I wonder how many people the development of those machines has put out of work?"
And, at that point, I decided that I would take a stand against the march of technology that has done so much to harm the employment prospects of my fellow man. Therefore, I didn't purchase the fan and instead placed the following advertisement in the local newsagent:
Punkah Wallah Wanted!!
- Seasonal work opportunity.
- Wallah must be able to provide own Punkah.
- As this is for a 3 storey townhouse the Punkah must have an especially long rope or the Wallah must have unusually long arms.
- Excellent rates of pay for the right candidate.
- Apply within.
I already feel better about myself.
Am I a mummy blogger?
I've been thinking a lot lately about where, and how, I should position my blog in order to gain readers.
And, I always seems to end up asking myself the same questions:
1) Do I actually want people reading my blog? Well, I've taken the time to note my views on important events in my life, albeit anonymously, so yes I must.
2) Am I a mummy blogger? Well, this term seems quite gender specific, so I am afraid that the answer must be no.
3) Am I a daddy blogger? Well, I am a daddy but I wouldn't want to be defined by that element of my life any more then I would want to be defined by my profession, my hometown, my relationship status or even my favourite colour of underpants (it's blue for anyone who might be wondering). So, in answer, I'm not sure.
4) Am I in a state of heightened emotional stress which needs a vent? Almost certainly, but I could seek a counsellor, so again I'm unsure.
5) Am I a sarcastic git looking to express myself? That side of my personality exposes itself everyday, in almost every part of my life, so I think the answer must be no.
6) Do I wish to record the important events that occur in my life, so that I have a record to look back upon in the future? Yes, but then I could buy a diary.
7) Am I seeking approval for the many times I consider myself to be a bad daddy? Hmm, that's a tricky one. I guess the answer is yes, but there is also the risk that you will damn me, so again I'm not sure.
8) Am I doing this for fame and fortune? Well, I must admit that I do turn a slight shade of green when I read some of the lovely reviews undertaken by some bloggers, i.e. the Florida 6. However, I am also aware that their writing abilities are infinitely better then mine and they deserve the following they have so carefully developed over a sustained period of time. So no, I'm not doing blogging for fame and fortune.
9) Am I doing this make new friends? I am hopeful that, as a by-product of blogging, I will make some new friends. After all you can never have too many! But no, it's not the reason I started a blog (but please feel free to pop by and say hi!).
Therefore, and despite much soul searching, I have decided that I won't assign this blog to any category but instead it will remain my inane observations on my life. If anyone decides to drop by, and likes what they see then great, I hope you enjoy it, but if not c'est la vie.
Oh and one final question that comes to mind after reading this post?
10) Do I think about things too deeply at times? Definitely
And, I always seems to end up asking myself the same questions:
1) Do I actually want people reading my blog? Well, I've taken the time to note my views on important events in my life, albeit anonymously, so yes I must.
2) Am I a mummy blogger? Well, this term seems quite gender specific, so I am afraid that the answer must be no.
3) Am I a daddy blogger? Well, I am a daddy but I wouldn't want to be defined by that element of my life any more then I would want to be defined by my profession, my hometown, my relationship status or even my favourite colour of underpants (it's blue for anyone who might be wondering). So, in answer, I'm not sure.
4) Am I in a state of heightened emotional stress which needs a vent? Almost certainly, but I could seek a counsellor, so again I'm unsure.
5) Am I a sarcastic git looking to express myself? That side of my personality exposes itself everyday, in almost every part of my life, so I think the answer must be no.
6) Do I wish to record the important events that occur in my life, so that I have a record to look back upon in the future? Yes, but then I could buy a diary.
7) Am I seeking approval for the many times I consider myself to be a bad daddy? Hmm, that's a tricky one. I guess the answer is yes, but there is also the risk that you will damn me, so again I'm not sure.
8) Am I doing this for fame and fortune? Well, I must admit that I do turn a slight shade of green when I read some of the lovely reviews undertaken by some bloggers, i.e. the Florida 6. However, I am also aware that their writing abilities are infinitely better then mine and they deserve the following they have so carefully developed over a sustained period of time. So no, I'm not doing blogging for fame and fortune.
9) Am I doing this make new friends? I am hopeful that, as a by-product of blogging, I will make some new friends. After all you can never have too many! But no, it's not the reason I started a blog (but please feel free to pop by and say hi!).
Therefore, and despite much soul searching, I have decided that I won't assign this blog to any category but instead it will remain my inane observations on my life. If anyone decides to drop by, and likes what they see then great, I hope you enjoy it, but if not c'est la vie.
Oh and one final question that comes to mind after reading this post?
10) Do I think about things too deeply at times? Definitely
Monday, 28 June 2010
My Children
When my ex wife decided that it was time for our marriage to end I didn't mind too much, after all our marriage must have been fatally wounded if one party wanted to end it so much.
When my ex wife then decided that the time was right to introduce me to her new partner, the one whom shared our relationship for some time, I didn't mind and graciously shook their hand and welcomed them to the extended family. After all, at this time the marriage was dead.
However, the one major regret I do have over the death of the marriage is the status I now have as a "non resident parent." This probably means very little to anyone that isn't a "non-resident parent" but what it means to me is that I only get to see my children once a week. Therefore, I only get to hold them, to kiss them and to tuck them into bed once a week.
Now these thoughts were brought home to me yesterday when I had to release the butterflies that my and children and I had been housing and nurturing since they were tiny little eggs. But, as my children were at their mothers they never got to see the momentous occasion when the butterflies flew freely into the big wide world.
Which made me think, and wonder, how much of my children's life I will miss?. Will I miss their first few steps into the big wide world? I certainly hope not.
When my ex wife then decided that the time was right to introduce me to her new partner, the one whom shared our relationship for some time, I didn't mind and graciously shook their hand and welcomed them to the extended family. After all, at this time the marriage was dead.
However, the one major regret I do have over the death of the marriage is the status I now have as a "non resident parent." This probably means very little to anyone that isn't a "non-resident parent" but what it means to me is that I only get to see my children once a week. Therefore, I only get to hold them, to kiss them and to tuck them into bed once a week.
Now these thoughts were brought home to me yesterday when I had to release the butterflies that my and children and I had been housing and nurturing since they were tiny little eggs. But, as my children were at their mothers they never got to see the momentous occasion when the butterflies flew freely into the big wide world.
Which made me think, and wonder, how much of my children's life I will miss?. Will I miss their first few steps into the big wide world? I certainly hope not.
Sunday, 27 June 2010
My Nana
When I was a little boy I had two nanas. I had my little nana and my big nana. I now only have one nana, my big nana. My little nana was a caricature of a nana. As her name would suggest she was only little, she was very thin (if not frail), and had the slight hunchback so often adorned by the elderly. She had grey hair which, at the front, was tinged yellow from decades of chain smoking.
My nana never had much despite the fact she worked all of her life. She only retired when the factory owner decided that, at the age of 78, she should finally have a rest. What she did have, however, she gave away with much love and affection. I always remember that she would bring me sweets, toys and comics. But, perhaps, the most important gift my nana gave me was a questioning mind.
You see there were certain things that bugged my nana not least of which was the withdrawal of free milk from school children and despite trying to understand this move I don’t believe that she ever found an answer that sat properly with her. She used to ask,
“You don’t take things from kiddies. What have they done wrong?” And, of course, there was no answer to this question – well at least not a satisfactory one.
It is because of this questioning mind that I find myself slightly disturbed when I read that:
a) The government is considering limiting the use of IVF on the NHS,
b) That 16 year old asylum seekers are to be sent back to war zones,
c) That benefit payments are to be frozen,
Surely, to my mind at least,
a) IVF should be an essential NHS service and not a fringe benefit that can be withdrawn at any time. A right to raise children should not be the preserve of the lucky and the rich.
b) Children should not be returned to war zones to face uncertain futures. They should be encouraged to grow in our society and to gain an education. They should be provided with the opportunities that so many of us take as given. That way they will add to the diversity that is so great about this country and some may even choose to return to their war torn homelands and build a better society there.
c) The poorest of this country should not be forced to pay for the excesses of the rich. Children should not be living in poverty in, what is, a rich country. I have an idea, why not make the multi-millionaire bankers pay back some of the massive wages they have been taking for bleeding this nation dry?
My nana never had much despite the fact she worked all of her life. She only retired when the factory owner decided that, at the age of 78, she should finally have a rest. What she did have, however, she gave away with much love and affection. I always remember that she would bring me sweets, toys and comics. But, perhaps, the most important gift my nana gave me was a questioning mind.
You see there were certain things that bugged my nana not least of which was the withdrawal of free milk from school children and despite trying to understand this move I don’t believe that she ever found an answer that sat properly with her. She used to ask,
“You don’t take things from kiddies. What have they done wrong?” And, of course, there was no answer to this question – well at least not a satisfactory one.
It is because of this questioning mind that I find myself slightly disturbed when I read that:
a) The government is considering limiting the use of IVF on the NHS,
b) That 16 year old asylum seekers are to be sent back to war zones,
c) That benefit payments are to be frozen,
Surely, to my mind at least,
a) IVF should be an essential NHS service and not a fringe benefit that can be withdrawn at any time. A right to raise children should not be the preserve of the lucky and the rich.
b) Children should not be returned to war zones to face uncertain futures. They should be encouraged to grow in our society and to gain an education. They should be provided with the opportunities that so many of us take as given. That way they will add to the diversity that is so great about this country and some may even choose to return to their war torn homelands and build a better society there.
c) The poorest of this country should not be forced to pay for the excesses of the rich. Children should not be living in poverty in, what is, a rich country. I have an idea, why not make the multi-millionaire bankers pay back some of the massive wages they have been taking for bleeding this nation dry?
Mummy Blogger
I used to like the term Mummy Blogger but that was when I thought it was a quaint English version of the American Gangster slang “Mother F***er.”
Imagine my horror, therefore, when I read this definition of a mummy blogger,
“a woman who writes passionately about her life and life as she sees it, sharing some good ideas, products and more along the way.”
WTF??
I mean what is this the 19th century? Have I woken up in a parallel universe? Has nobody in the mummy blogging world heard about sexism? Or, is it just that mummies don’t care if the poor daddies of this world are the ones being downtrodden?
Therefore, I have decided that I must take it upon myself to right this wrong and correct this affliction to my common man. It is my cause celebre to ensure that the title “mummy blogger” is assigned to the trash can and a new name be created that better reflects the mixed diversity of the people that undertake this role.
My suggestion for this would be Blogger Man (i.e. as in Fireman, Milkman etc.).
Let me know what you think.
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